Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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