i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
