He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
