problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
