i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I accidentally burped into my bong.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
