Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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