how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I need to sanitize my soul.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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