she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
