I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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