My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
