oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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