Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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