Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Randomize
