I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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