I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize