Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
he fucked my hip out of place.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
