only if we run a train.
done.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Randomize