mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
It's shark week go big or go home
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
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