Plan B is the new Plan A
i just had sex bonerless
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
