Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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