did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
