you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
