sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
