I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I got her a Nickelback box set.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
