I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
