that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
