i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
My vagina is officially offended.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
