I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
