I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
