butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize