So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize
