Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
