I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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