she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I just blew my weed a kiss
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
