The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
