There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
