i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
