I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
