My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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