Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
You have to summon your inner elephant
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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