if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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