can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Randomize
