Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
How does one acquire holy water?
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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