Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
