No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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