Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
