For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
