meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
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