Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
this just has baby written all over it
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize