yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Randomize
